On the Curious Subject of Seekers
by Acteon Carolsfeld
Summary: A nameless journalist from a small broadcasting firm in Iacon investigates various popular rumours on the mating habits of the mysterious Seekers of Vos. WARNING: Abundance of silliness.


**IMPORTANT:** This one-shot is compatible with "Insatiable" verse. You do not need to have read "Insatiable" to understand this, but there are little things here and there that make reference to that arc.

Disclaimer: Do not own Transformers.

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><p><strong>On the Curious Subject of Seekers<strong>

:_Dingbat, I have a rough draft for the article._:

:_Good, send it o'er, main terminal three._:

:_It hasn't been edited, though. I'm nowhere near being done._:

:_Send it o'er anyway. I need'a see._:

:_Got it. Coming you way._:

:_Good. By the way, don't worry 'bout revisin' it. That's what Proofer's for._:

:_You're the boss, Dingbat._:

Draft 1: Seekers and Rumours

by: Stringer

Seekers, the pride of Vos, have always been a mystery shrouded in mystery. The proud avian creatures have fascinated ground-bound mechs for countless vorns, yet their secrets, locked away behind a veil of flawless beauty, have never been investigated or revealed. Many-an-optic gaze upon the high walls of the flight-bound city, and many-a-processor fabricate likely assumptions based on only imagination and possibly wishful thinking. Rumours are abundant amongst the common folk, yet even the Great Archives of Iacon hold no data-pads pertaining to the enigma that is Vos and its inhabitants. However, one must wonder, beneath the heaps of fabrications, might truth, however small, exist?

:_Proofer._:

:_Yeah?_:

:_I'm sendin' o'er somethin'. Y'got it?_:

:_Yeah, I'm looking. Stringer again? How long do we gotta keep him for?_:

:_Till his apprenticeship's finished. I dunno why he's studyin' t'be a journalist. He's better off bein' a poet. "A veil of flawless beauty"? Are you kiddin' me?_:

:_Hey c'mon, give the kid a break! He's got potential._:

:_Keep readin' before tellin' me if he's got potential or not._:

After a lengthy survey of five hundred mechs from all walks of life, the term most frequently uttered upon questioned about the traits of a Seeker was, unsurprisingly, "promiscuity". One can find many references to the eager nature of a Seeker in participation of an act of intimacy in many veins of popular media, most often seen in holo-movies and entertainment pads. Such is sometimes treated in humour, whereas other times, it is treated with absolute seriousness. An average Seeker is rumoured to share a berth with five to twenty mechs in a single deca-cycle, only taking breaks to refuel between sessions in the case of the latter statistic. It is questionable where ground-bound mechs had received such information regarding a Seeker's flexible choice in berth-partners. None of the subjects, upon inquiry, had been able to locate their source.

:_Pff-hahahaha! Pits, Dingbat! Why'd you give him this topic again?_:

:_I wanted ta show 'im per'aps being' a journalist's not fer him if he can't even talk 'bout interfacin' without twistin' a cable. The kid sounds stiffer than a pole. And stop laughin'! I already have a processor-ache…_:

:-_Hahaha, alright, alright._:

The talk of promiscuity is often related to a popular belief that Seekers are afflicted by a condition called "heat-cycles".

:_Is that really an affliction you can have? 'Cause there are these times when I—_:

:_Just keep readin', Proofer._:

It is unclear how often such "heat-cycles" occur, and how long they last. However, their presence is extremely recurrent in the minds of many. According to one adamant participant in the survey, he had been approached by a Seeker during such period of time. The Seeker was "rabid with desire", and proceeded to "['face] him till he entered stasis-lock".

:_Haha! Hahaha! Oh sweet Primus—Haha_-:

:_Keep readin', Proofer._:

The reason for "heat-cycles" seems to be for the purpose of creating new sparks. However, the adamant participant refused to offer a response to the possibility that he might very well be the sire-creator of a Seekerling. Regardless, "heat-cycles" are a popular belief shared by many ground-bound mechs, who seem reluctant to think otherwise despite the lack of proof.

:_Why does he keep quoting heat-cycles? And where'd he find the guy that fragged a Seeker?_:

:_Primus knows. If we're lucky, the bot's only got a few loose screws in the helm._:

A popular method employed by Seekers to seek out a mate during "heat-cycles" is by song. The colourful, extravagant language of Seeker-cant seems perfect for such musical endeavors, which may explain the origin of such rumour. The "mating song" of every Seeker differs, and the inflection of the melody reflects the nature of the Seeker's interest in a berth partner. According to a source that wishes to remain anonymous, Seekers often incorporate segments of popular song into their mating calls. This makes the Seeker more attractive to potential mates, as it suggests a youthful age, and it allows room for improvisation on the popular tune, which suggests quick processor speeds. Music is very important in the world of Seekers, so it is only natural for it to be used when in desire of intimate company.

:_Where does he find these sources?_:

:_I really dunno._:

:_Have you ever heard a Seeker sing before?_:

:_Have you e'er _seen_ a Seeker before?_:

:…_Point._:

After a successful "heat-cycle", the Seeker will begin a process termed as "nesting". During the nesting stage, the Seeker remains in his personal chambers, and proceeds to emit round capsules containing the growing Seekerling. The capsules have another designation, more common amongst the fliers of Vos, called "eggs". These "eggs" house the combined genetic coding of both creators, as well as the new spark, and require constant warmth to ensure the birth of a healthy sparkling. A Seeker can lay anywhere between one to five eggs per sparking. However, the anonymous source insists that there had been a record of twenty eggs in Vosian history, and that such record holds its own platter in the Hall of Extraordinary Accomplishments in the Central Archives of Vos.

:_Wait, where does the sparkling get materials to build his frame if he's in an egg?_:

:_Slag if I know, Proofer. I ain't no Seeker expert._:

:_…Dingbat…Are you sure this is reliable material?_:

:_I dunno, but it'll haft'a do. We're no "Iacon Daily", so no one'll come houndin' after us, especially since it's by some runt from a third-rate academy. All I want y't'do is get rid o' the dry and make it less like a research essay._:

:_That I can do, boss._:

:_Good. But keep the last paragraph. That one's at least interesting t'read._:

Throughout the research and investigation, the journalist has had the great honour of finding a Seeker for a brief interview. The Seeker, who wishes to remain anonymous and shall be given the designation of "Screamer", was reluctant but patient to hear the journalist out. Unfortunately, the only input Screamer had offered was an indignant "what in the pits is the matter with you" and a slap before flying away in anger. The journalist is unsure of how to interpret such answer. However, one thing is clear: The existence of a "mating song" is very likely fabricated. If such were true, the journalist highly worries about the success rate of Screamer's song. You see, readers, Screamer has the most piercing vocalizer the journalist has ever heard, and to hear such vocalizer in song will most definitely be a torture most unimaginable.

:_Stringer._:

:_Yeah?_:

:_Yer article'll do. It'll be up on the network at eighth-joor next cycle._:

:_Really? Wow! Thank you, Dingbat! I worked really hard on it!_:

:_Yeah, yeah, don't mention it…_:

:_Is there anything else you'd like me to do?_:

:_Ehhh…Just take a break, Stringer. Go outside. Hang around. Do what y' academy-bots do._:

:_Sure thing, Dingbat! Thanks again!_:

:_Don't mention it…_:

Stringer, with a skip in his steps and a big smile on his faceplate, walked out of the broadcasting firm. He hopped down the stairs, took a deep cycle of fresh air, and proceeded to beam at every ashen-faced Iaconian working class that walked past him as he made his way down the street. Just as he passed by an alleyway, a whispered "hey!" caught his attention. Immediately pausing, he peered into the shadows, and spotted the correspondent of his article leaning against the wall.

"Hey!" He greeted eagerly, bouncing into the dark alley. "What are you doing here, Starsparkle?"

Starsparkle pushed off from the wall, and flicked his dark wings, which sported purple stripes. He sauntered over with a wide grin on his white faceplate, and gazed at Stringer with no small amount of mirthful amusement.

"Nothing much, Stringer," He spoke in a voice that was almost too friendly, and gave his chin a small jerk toward the ground pounder, "So, you gonna get that article published or what?"

"Yeah!" Stringer's optics brightened even further in happiness. "Dingbat said it's going up on the network next cycle!"

"Nice!" Starsparkle laughed in a manner that sounded awfully like a snicker, and placed a purple hand on the grounder's shoulder. "I'm very happy for you, Stringer."

"Me, too! But I couldn't have done it without your help, Starsparkle. I owe you big time!" Stringer smiled in thanks, and his optics shimmered.

The Seeker shrugged nonchalantly, "Don' worry about it. Anything for my friend."

The grounder's smile widened further. "Say, you wanna go grab a cube together?" He asked enthusiastically. "My treat!"

"I'd love to, Stringer, but I got work." The purple Seeker shrugged again, and patted his ground-bound friend on the shoulder. "Maybe next time," He carelessly tossed out a promise, and turned to walk away with a small wave of a hand.

"Next time for sure, Starsparkle!" Stringer called after his flier acquaintance, and watched in great awe as the Seeker simply vanished in a puff of purple smoke.

"Wow," the grounder journalist whispered to himself, "Seekers can _teleport_!"

Three cycles later, Dingbat received an angered comm. from a Vosian official demanding that he take down the maliciously misinforming article regarding Seekers on his broadcasting channel. Somewhere in Vos, a purple Seeker teleporter laughed so hard that he fell off his chair.

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><p><strong>Notes:<strong> I have successfully written a one-shot! I'm rather proud of myself, despite the utter silliness of this little piece, haha! :D This little story took about 2 hours to write, and it's purposely left unedited since the article is a rough draft.

Dingbat and Stringer are all newspaper terms, if anyone's wondering. And, in case of confusion, Stringer didn't actually interview Starscream. That was all Skywarp too. XD

Hope you enjoyed this tiny installment as much as I did writing it. I've never written something so ridiculous before, so a review would be lovely.

Thanks for reading, and please leave me a few words! :))))


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